I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
