dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
No stitches, just platelets and will power
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
