you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
