Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
