Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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