if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
