it wasn't lemon gatorade
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Randomize
