Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
