McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
