Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
