You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
