"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
the liver wants what the liver wants
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Randomize
