I am full of burrito and curiosity
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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