You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
