i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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