so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
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