Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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