I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
