we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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