return my video game
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
