accomplished twins. life is a go
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
