I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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