all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
PANTIES FOUND
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