3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
