A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I forgot how hot balto sounded
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
