so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
How drunk are you?
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