New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
