my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Randomize