found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Randomize
