we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
