Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
