Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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