they need to just BURY HIM!
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Come share oat with me in your robe
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Randomize
