Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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