am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
