We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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