yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
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