I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Randomize
