Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize
