had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
porn star boner night. come get it.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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