I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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