This is not my ceiling
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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