My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Acid is not a monday night drug
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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