you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
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