I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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