apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Randomize
