if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Randomize
