Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.�
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
