thus making me awesome and them whores
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
