U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Randomize